Christian Pipe Smokers

Fellas,

I feel so completely stupid typing this out. I feel like a complete and total failure as a husband and father, but I have made a huge mistake with our taxes this year. I took a new job in October of '22. Of course, everything is automated these days, and my paycheck is simply automatically deposited into my bank account. I do have an app on my phone, that honestly, should have been easy enough for me to follow, but I just simply missed the fact that I have not had federal income tax withheld. None...for the entire year.

So, in the near future, we are going to be hit with a very large bill. I thought that surely this has been a mistake. I even pulled up our last year's tax filing. I worked for three months at this company last year. Sure enough, there were no federal taxes withheld then either.

My wife filed our taxes last year as I had another family situation going on at the time so I was completely uninvolved. We actually got a refund of about 2K, so the idea of not having income tax withheld at the new job never crossed my mind. During our years as missionaries, our mission organization had always handled filing our taxes for us. I carried that level of being uninvolved with the process into our stateside life and it is a major failure on my part as the leader of my family.

On top of this, we have been dealing with some severely pressing health issues with my middle daughter since July. The physical problems led to mental health issue as well. Of course, none of this has been cheap either. We have paid many thousands of dollars in medical bills just these last few months. we met our out-of-pocket expense some time ago for both her and my wife (who, as you know, also has some pretty major health problems. Of course, with the start of the new year, we will once again have to begin again paying for these medical costs.

A heaviness hangs over our house. We love our Lord and we "know" that He loves us. But if I am honest, there have been a lot of days through this season that we do not feel His love. Our emotions wage war on us. I long for the day that God's peace and joy inhabit each one of us, despite the hardships we are facing.

Our emotions do not change the character of our Father. I know He will provide, though I can't imagine how. But I don't want the days between now and then to be lived in chains of worry. My wife especially is beaten down in spirit. I want to, so badly, lift that off of her. Because of this I feel all the more that I have failed her in this instance.

Please pray diligently for my family. Please cry out to our Lord to deliver us from our worry and fears. Beg him to rid my daughter of her sicknesses. And pray that we would experience financial freedom. I am not asking for, nor do I desire, exceeding wealth. I just want to know days where we are not chased by bills and the hardships that caused them.

I am willing to do all that I need to in order to pay my debts. However, I already work a minimum of 10 hours a day at my job. I will gladly take on a second job if I need to (though I already do side work as I can).

Please pray for me, for my wife, and for my daughters. May we glorify God in these trials...and may He deliver us into a season of rest.

Praying.

+JMJ+

Jocose wrote: ↑22 Dec 2023, 20:56Praying.

Praying, friend.

Between the medical expenses and tax liability, I strongly urge you to find a professional tax preparer/CPA who has experience guiding clients through this. This is not a job for cut-rate services like H&R Block or Jackson-Hewitt, and you don't want to do this yourself.

Lots and lots of people owe back tax liabilities. A good tax pro can negotiate terms with IRS and get penalties waived, often saving you more than the cost of expert advice.

Tax pro can negotiate terms with IRS for an affordable payment plan, although you might get better rates/terms with a bank loan.

Medical cost deductions can be a nightmare to figure out. Tax pro can guide you through this, as well.

You are already working at max hours to provide for your family. You don't have time for tax problems that are outside of your expertise.

Start shopping for a tax guy right after Christmas/New Year. In a few weeks, these guys are going to up to their earballs in tax returns. For now, they still have time to hear out a new client with special concerns.

Praying for you and your family, especially Maddie. Such a sweetheart!

Take Del's advice about finding and hiring an expert. Unless you have a bunch of unusual income sources or expenses, this will be easy for them and fairly cheap for you. It's usually difficult to hit the threshold where you can deduct unreimbursed medical expenses (your health insurance premiums count) but you may be there this year. And, as Del wrote, you'll likely be facing a stiff penalty for under-withholding but a pro can plead your case.

I've written about this before, but we all feel like horrible failures as husbands and fathers sometimes. We most often look at our fathers (not the Father) as examples and, if they were decent men, they probably never let us see their struggles so we walked into adulthood unaware and unprepared. Not burdening the family with heavy problems is good, but not letting us know they will come is not. You'll figure it out.

Praying.

Praying

I just saw this...Del and FredS are the voices of wisdom. Do not try to bear this burdon by yourself. There is help. I am keeping you and your family in prayer...amen

Bloodhound wrote: ↑27 Dec 2023, 09:12 I am jeeping you and your family in prayer...amen

So ... you're wrangling for him in prayer? Or just going on a Safari? You my be asking YJ?