The cigar guy cracked me up

Bloodhound · Post by **Bloodhound** » 09 Sep 2022, 12:46

So yesterday was a "kick you in the gut" kind of day...I wanted to treat myself to a cigar. I went to the shop in town that was opened by the Marine Vets and recently sold to a cigar shop chain.

I told the clerk that I was mostly a pipe smoker, and he said oh we have a great selection of pipes and pipe tobacco...That was the first funny thing he said...they had 6 basket/no name pipes and a small display box Missouri Meerschaum Mini pipes and 7 jars of bulk Peter Stokkebye tobaccos.

Then he really cracked me up by showing me the best/coolest tool. He was telling me about it as we went to the register from the humidor. He said is so cool its 3 tools in one, a pick, a scoop and then a foot to "tap the tobacco in the pipes tobacco cup". He said he had never seen a tool like this but he had made sure that when they took over this shop that he had lots of these cool 3 in 1 tools...and they are not that expensive, just $5.95...he said you could even use the pick as a punch for a cigar...

When we got to the register he showed me this

I told him that I had a few of these in my kit and they are handy..I didn't need to buy one at this time

joegoat · Post by **joegoat** » 09 Sep 2022, 12:52

Where have the true tobacconists gone?

Bloodhound · Post by **Bloodhound** » 09 Sep 2022, 14:10

He for sure didn't know pipes...and based on the cigar he suggested, he didn't know much about cigars either

jmg · Post by **jmg** » 09 Sep 2022, 14:21

joegoat wrote: ↑09 Sep 2022, 12:52 Where have the true tobacconists gone?

Mississippi.

JimVH · Post by **JimVH** » 09 Sep 2022, 14:48

Poor guy. One day he'll learn the truth and feel dumb.

Or not.

Off topic, but along the line of retail dumbness:
I was in Academy Sports one time (back then it was Academy Surplus) looking at the handgun case. I commented to the young lady behind the counter that that was an odd looking flashlight in the case and she lit-up, excited to show me that it was also a squirt gun. Before I could even react she pressed the button and shot me right in the upper chest. It was a squirt gun alright, only it was pepper spray.

I don't remember what kind of day I was having when I went in, but I sure remember how I left.

Hugo Drax · Post by **Hugo Drax** » 09 Sep 2022, 15:11

jmg wrote: ↑09 Sep 2022, 14:21
joegoat wrote: ↑09 Sep 2022, 12:52 Where have the true tobacconists gone?
Mississippi.

As a whole, pipe smokers buy it online for less than we can buy it for, let alone resell it, then come in and tell us our prices are outrageous, the general quality is down, and proceed to enlighten us with what the prices were in the PX in 1963.

As a group, pipe smokers committed seppuku. Theyre pragmatic and calculating to a fault. The result is unintentional, of course, but pipe smokers killed the brick and mortar.

Tobacconists have to genuinely love the business to be involved, particularly because a tin or two a week doesn't really help the bottom line, and the average modern pipe smokers is two tins a month.

Believe it or not, we love you, and that's why we do it. Not all of us are worthy of love, of course, but do realize we love talking to you and that poor kid doesn't know his trade yet.

Del · Post by **Del** » 09 Sep 2022, 21:17

JimVH wrote: ↑09 Sep 2022, 14:48 Poor guy. One day he'll learn the truth and feel dumb.

Or not.

Off topic, but along the line of retail dumbness:
I was in Academy Sports one time (back then it was Academy Surplus) looking at the handgun case. I commented to the young lady behind the counter that that was an odd looking flashlight in the case and she lit-up, excited to show me that it was also a squirt gun. Before I could even react she pressed the button and shot me right in the upper chest. It was a squirt gun alright, only it was pepper spray.

I don't remember what kind of day I was having when I went in, but I sure remember how I left.

It couldn't have happened to a nicer guy, I'll tell you what!

mcommini · Post by **mcommini** » 10 Sep 2022, 08:21

Hugo Drax wrote: ↑09 Sep 2022, 15:11
jmg wrote: ↑09 Sep 2022, 14:21
joegoat wrote: ↑09 Sep 2022, 12:52 Where have the true tobacconists gone?
Mississippi.
As a whole, pipe smokers buy it online for less than we can buy it for, let alone resell it, then come in and tell us our prices are outrageous, the general quality is down, and proceed to enlighten us with what the prices were in the PX in 1963.

As a group, pipe smokers committed seppuku. Theyre pragmatic and calculating to a fault. The result is unintentional, of course, but pipe smokers killed the brick and mortar.

Tobacconists have to genuinely love the business to be involved, particularly because a tin or two a week doesn't really help the bottom line, and the average modern pipe smokers is two tins a month.

Believe it or not, we love you, and that's why we do it. Not all of us are worthy of love, of course, but do realize we love talking to you and that poor kid doesn't know his trade yet.

Yep. Those online stores that go like gangbusters are in states with low or no tobacco taxes added on to the the already ridiculous federal taxes. In a lot of places your local tobacconist doesn't have a hope at selling at anything less than 100 markup from what you see online just due to the taxes.

I've mentioned in other threads and will probably harp on it for a while- our local b&m doesn't even carry tins anymore. When I first moved out here almost a decade ago they had one of the bigger selections of tinned tobacco I'd seen for a store of its size (about twice the size of those Tinderbox stores that you used to be able to find at just about any mall back when malls were a thing instead of a dying complex). They had to be selling tins at a loss toward the end there based on how reasonable the prices were compared to the local tax and even that was $5-10/ tin over the online prices.

Support local b&ms! Those guys are struggling to keep pipe tobacco around and let's face it we aren't really revenue generators even without taxes. If your store has good pipe tobacco available, it truly is a labor of love. If they have tins of tobacco you like, take the hit, or don't complain about lack of selection next time you go in.

FredS · Post by **FredS** » 10 Sep 2022, 09:06

Hugo Drax wrote: ↑09 Sep 2022, 15:11 As a group, pipe smokers committed seppuku. Theyre pragmatic and calculating to a fault. The result is unintentional, of course, but pipe smokers killed the brick and mortar. . . Tobacconists have to genuinely love the business to be involved, particularly because a tin or two a week doesn't really help the bottom line, and the average modern pipe smokers is two tins a month.

mcommini wrote: ↑10 Sep 2022, 08:21 Support local b&ms! Those guys are struggling to keep pipe tobacco around and let's face it we aren't really revenue generators even without taxes. If your store has good pipe tobacco available, it truly is a labor of love. If they have tins of tobacco you like, take the hit, or don't complain about lack of selection next time you go in.

And your local insurance salesman, butcher, and druggist. My preferred pharmacy is in old downtown, it's hard to find a parking space and it's owned by an 80 year old rude German woman who suspects everyone under the age of 50 of being a shoplifter. It's awesome.

Bloodhound · Post by **Bloodhound** » 10 Sep 2022, 09:28

I buy 95% from my local B&M. I only purchase stuff online when they don't have it in shop. I have a list with the favorite B&M and they try to get stuff in for me on special order or back on the shelves.

My tiny habit isn't keeping anyone's profit margins up, but I am one of what I hope are hundreds. This is a tough trade...tons to learn and not many to teach and a somewhat demanding customer base.

I just thought it was funny that his idea of great selection and a new tool were humorous. And it didn't stop me from spending the $$ ib the shop.

If I were in Jim's shoes and got pepper sprayed, I am thinking I might have walked out that day with a new gun that I got a deeeep discount on.